


A Smile that Faltered

by rychuu



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: M/M, So fair warning, Suicide is a topic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 11:29:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18151277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rychuu/pseuds/rychuu
Summary: Kokichi Ouma throws a party where he invites everyone from the class of the 53rd killing game and gives them all special gifts. Kaito Momota, however, is suspicious of Kokichi, and discovers the motive behind the madness.--This was written for tumblr user kosonah!I hope you enjoy!





	A Smile that Faltered

Kaito didn’t remember the last time he saw everyone so happy.

It was just after Christmas Day. Kokichi had invited the whole cast from the 53rd and final season of Danganronpa to a party, supposedly to celebrate the holiday. Kaito remembered everyone being hesitant, unsure of whether or not to trust Kokichi’s intentions, but there was a promise of special gifts for everyone who RSVPed and showed up. Figuring there was nothing to lose and everything to gain, Kaito decided to convince everyone to go. Even Maki couldn’t turn him down, though she insisted she was only attending because she didn’t want to see Kaito or Shuichi get into trouble.

Once everyone was at the party, Kokichi started giving out the supposed gifts, and instructed them to open the gifts as soon as possible. Each was indeed special, with no pranks in sight; just very well, thought-out gifts that made everyone’s faces fill with joy and excitement. Even Maki smiled faintly at receiving an over sized teddy bear and a galaxy pendant.

Everyone seemed so happy… Yet there was one smile that didn’t seem all that real.

The way Kokichi smiled, the way he laughed… it seemed so strange. What was even more odd was Kokichi’s lack of mischief. There were no pranks, no jokes, nothing but him watching the others from the couch. He was barely even engaging in conversation.

No, something was wrong. It was so very wrong. Kaito could feel it in his gut, something about all of this was just _wrong._

Before he could think more about it, however, he spotted Shuichi with Kaede and Maki in the corner of the living room.

Maybe Shuichi noticed it, too—how strange everything was.

“Oh, hey bro!” Kaito called out to him, and immediately made a beeline to them. “I’ve been looking for you! I gotta ask you something.”

“Oh, Kaito...” Shuichi ducked his head a little, smiling just as bashful as always. “What’s going on?”

Kaito hummed for a moment, trying to find his words as his eyes settled on Kokichi, sitting on the couch across the room. “I was wondering… Does any of this feel weird to you?”

“Hm? Oh, you mean the party?” Shuichi glanced away and shrugged. “It’s a little strange that Kokichi suddenly decided to throw this party. I suppose this _is_ supposed to be a Christmas party, but...”

“It’s _absolutely_ weird that he’s doing this,” Maki interjected with her own little scoff. “I don’t trust it one bit. I’m sure he’s got something terrible planned.”

Kaede snorted. “What, like your teddy bear is gonna explode? Relax, Maki. He’s just like a mischievous little kid.”

“Says _you._ You didn’t have to deal with him as long as we—”

“Well, maybe… this is his way of making amends,” Shuichi muttered, just loud enough to interrupt Maki’s train of thought. “I’ve… noticed hes been avoiding certain people. Gonta, Miu, and Kaito especially.”

Kaito blinked as he turned to Shuichi. “What? Really? He’s been avoiding me?”

“Did you really not notice? Geez, you really _are_ clueless.” Maki glanced over to Kokichi before settling her eyes on Kaito. _“Especially_ you. Whenever you get five feet from him he immediately disappears.”

“Why is he avoiding me?” Kaito frowned. “Did I do something?”

“No, I don’t think that’s it… otherwise it would just be you he was avoiding, right?” Shuichi glanced over to Gonta, frowning as he looked around. “He’s also been avoiding Gonta. He hasn’t even said anything to him after giving him his gift.”

Kaito rubbed the back of his head, nerves settling in his chest. “Huh, now that you mention it… I haven’t talked to Kokichi since I got my gift, either.”

“See? He’s avoiding you.” Maki sighed. “Only an idiot wouldn’t notice that.”

Kaito turned to Shuichi, frown deepening. “And you think his is ‘cause he feels bad, or something?”

“Well… it’s just a theory. He hasn’t done anything unpleasant the whole night.” Shuichi shifted his weight. “I really think… he’s trying to make amends. The gifts he got everyone… He took a lot of time to find each of us something we’d love.”

Kaede’s smile had fallen slightly, and she gave a nervous laugh. “Maybe he wants to make peace with everyone before he leaves...”

“‘Leaves’?” Kaito, Shuichi, and Maki all echoed her, but it was Kaito who pushed for more answers. “What do you mean, ‘leaves’?”

“Oh, he didn’t tell you guys?” Kaede’s smile had completely faded into a frown, and she twirled the cord of her headphones around her index finger. “When I thanked him for the headphones, I told him that I’d get him a free ticket to my next concert. He told me he wouldn’t be able to make it because he was leaving the country tomorrow morning.”

“Leaving the country?” Something was setting of huge alarm bells in Kaito’s mind. “Where’s he going?”

Kaede shrugged. “I was… a little distracted with my headphones, so I don’t remember the details.”

Shuichi covered his mouth with his hand, a tell that he always had when in deep contemplation. “Why would he be leaving the country? And why throw a party the day before? Surely, that would cause some major issues with leaving, even for a vacation...”

“That _is_ weird,” Maki agreed. “But… Kokichi’s never been easy to understand. So it just might be a ‘him’ thing.”

“Maybe...”

Kaede might have verbally agreed, and Shuichi might have remained silent, but Kaito wasn’t at all convinced. Kokichi’s actions and behavior were setting off all kinds of red flags, and if he knew Kokichi at all…

… Kaito slipped away from the group wordlessly, not paying any mind to the trio that called out to him. He was a man on a mission.

Kaito didn’t make a beeline for Kokichi, however. Instead, he got close enough to where he could see him completely and maybe hear him if he focused hard enough, but not close enough to make his plan obvious. Kaito turned to Gonta, who happened to be standing right next to him now, and as if to loudly talk over the noise of a party, shouted; “Hey, Gonta! You seen Kokichi anywhere?” Kaito was forcing out his own smile, making sure not to glance _too_ obviously at Kokichi. “I haven’t seen him since he gave me my planetarium, and I wanted to thank him for it!”

Gonta turned to Kaito, surprised, but only frowned. “No, I have not seen him either! I want to thank him, too… But every time I spot him, he disappears...”

While Gonta’s answer was useful, it wasn’t what Kaito was after. Side-eyeing Kokichi sitting on the couch, he saw Kokichi’s face went pale. Kaito then saw him stand up, slowly, whistling as he moved out of sight.

Bingo. Shuichi was right. Kokichi _was_ avoiding him.

“Maybe we should look for Kokichi together,” Gonta continued. “Then we can—”

“Ah, sorry big guy, I just realized something...” Ah, crap. Now he needed an excuse. “… I gotta use the bathroom! I’ll be right back.”

Before Gonta could protest, Kaito was gone, making a beeline for where he saw Kokichi disappear off to. Unfortunately, even just a moment was long enough for Kaito to lose him.

Well, it wasn’t like Kaito was expecting to get some answers out of Kokichi directly.

As Kaito made his way down the hall, his eyes fell onto the doorknob of Kokichi’s bedroom. With a quick twist, he quickly learned it was locked.

That wouldn’t stop him.

With a little trick in mind he learned from his childhood, Kaito slid into the kitchen to grab a butter knife, and quickly returned back to the bedroom door. Checking to make sure no one was looking, Kaito jammed the knife’s tip in between the latch bolt and the strike plate, and started to fiddle it around.

“C’mon… Come on, stupid...”

Without much effort, Kaito heard the latch bolt click, and the door was open a few inches.

With a quiet “yes!” and a small fist pump, Kaito quickly slipped inside and very gently closed the door behind him.

The room was dark, and Kaito squinted at the absence of light. However he didn’t reach for the light switch. Kokichi would know something was up if he saw his own bedroom light on. Instead, Kaito dug out his cellphone, and turned on the screen to use as a flashlight.

The room was a cluttered mess, with clothes, games, and plushies all over the floor. Kaito couldn’t even begin to imagine _living_ in such a mess.

Kaito continued to look around with his phone as his only guide, and came across a desk. On the desk was an assortment of clutter; checks written out to various charities, a length of thick cord bundled and tied up neatly to one side, and a stack of envelopes tucked into the opposite corner. Curious, he sat down to look over the envelopes, and his eyes widened at the first one.

It was addressed to Gonta Gokuhara, was sealed and stamped like a letter being ready to mail out. Except, there was no return address.

The next letters proved to be the same. Shuichi Saihara, Maki Harukawa, Himiko Yumeno, Kaede Akamatsu… Each and every one was a sealed envelope ready to be mailed, but with no return address.

When Kaito got to his own, he desperately wanted to open it. He wanted to see what was inside of those ominous looking letters, but he bit down the urge. Kokichi would know for sure if he opened it.

Kaito shuffled though the letters again, ready to put them back where he found them but then he noticed something. There were sixteen letters, yet there were only fifteen other students. Upon further inspection, he found an unsealed envelope that had no name or address written. There was no indication that Kokichi had every intention to mail it, either. There was just one word.

“ _Goodbye.”_

Kaito swallowed a lump in his throat and, careful not to tear anything, slipped the letter out and onto the table. He unfolded it, flattened it, and held the light over the words.

“ _To whom ever this may concern,”_ it started. _“There’s nothing left for me in this world to live for. I have nothing but the mistakes I’ve made. I have no one but myself, and I’m to blame. I don’t have much else to say. There really is nothing else **to** say.”_

“ _Even if it’s selfish, I want them all to remember me. I want them all to have one good memory of me.”_

“… _I’m sorry. For everything.”_

“ _-Kokichi Ouma.”_

Kaito stared at the note for a good, long while. The words were dancing in his mind, but he wasn’t able to process their meaning. He could barely comprehend what he had just read.

It was… a suicide note.

Just when he could finally wrap his head around the truth, the door to Kokichi’s bedroom swung open, and Kaito’s head jerked to see Kokichi standing in the doorway.

“Wh—what—” Kokichi’s eyes widened. “What are _you_ doing in _my_ room?!”

“Uh...” Kaito turned to completely face Kokichi, using his body to hide the incriminating evidence on the desk. Not that it would matter.

“My room was _locked.”_ Kokichi stormed inside, his eyes narrowing and brows furrowed. His glare was cold and hot all at once. “How did you get in here? What were you—”

With a sudden gasp, Kokichi had sprinted over to the desk. Kaito was only just able to get away and towards the door as Kokichi snatched up the suicide letter.

“You—” Kokichi snarled, hands shaking as he turned to face Kaito with feral eyes, full of fear mixed with anger. Kokichi’s body tensed, and he made a break for the door.

“Oh no you _don’t!”_ Kaito shouted, slamming the door shut and blocking Kokichi’s only route to escape with his own body. He locked the door for good measure. “You are _not_ running away from this!”

Frantic, Kokichi took a step back, and is eyes darted around. Looking for a way out, but failing. His eyes fell on Kaito, and he gritted his teeth. “You… you _asshole…!”_

“Call me whatever the hell you want, I’m not letting you run away,” Kaito growled. “You were planning to kill yourself, this whole time! I knew something was fishy about all of this, but—”

“It’s not that,” Kokichi interjected. With his hands shaking like a leaf, Kaito didn’t need more than half a second to tell Kokichi was lying. “I’m just leaving the country, that’s all.”

“Yeah, that’s the excuse you gave Kaede, isn’t it? You think I’m gonna fall for that shit?” Kaito balled his fists. “Cut the crap, or I’m tell _everyone_ what this party really is all about!”

Kokichi winced, and bowed his head in defeat. He was gritting his teeth, but remained silent.

Kaito didn’t know what to do. He knew he had to keep Kokichi trapped and get him to talk, but he had never dealt with a situation like this before. What could he do? What _should_ he do?

The words from the letter seeped into his mind. He had to start there.

“Is that… What you wrote, is that how you _actually_ feel? That you have nothing, or no one?” The words hurt to say, and Kaito felt his chest tighten. “Do you really feel _that_ alone?”

“… Why do you care?” Kokichi hissed. “It doesn’t matter. It’s my life, so who cares.”

“ _I_ care! I care about you, you dumb ass!” Kaito took a step forward towards Kokichi, but seeing him wince made him stop right in his tracks. Yelling and being angry wasn’t going to get him anywhere, so Kaito drew in a deep breath. “I care. I don’t want to see you—I don’t want _this._ None of us do.”

“Oh, screw you. Not a single one of you ever _really_ gave a damn about me before. Why should I believe you now?” Kokichi shook his head. “Not like it matters. You don’t know what it’s like, living like this.”

“That’s not true—”

“It _is_ true!” Kokichi spat. “None of you know what it’s like to know that literally everything about you was a big fat lie! Sure, maybe some of you have some parts of your past that was entirely made up, but at least you guys have _something_ real! I have _nothing!”_ Angry tears formed in the corners of Kokichi’s eyes. His breathing was harsh and heavy. “I don’t have any semblance of a family, I have no friends, all I have is a dead-end job and this stupid, empty apartment! Everything I remember about my life was just a made-up story made by a sad, pathetic kid with nothing! And now I’m stuck in _his_ life—his sad, lonely, miserable life that’s going nowhere fast, and I _hate_ it!”

Kokichi started hugging himself, the anger melting into pure misery and despair, and a few broken sobs shook his shoulders. “Shuichi was right. I’m alone, and I always _will_ be. And if that’s how I have to live, then I don’t _want_ to. I can’t take it anymore. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t...”

Hearing Kokichi break down made Kaito’s chest tighten, and he could just feel his own eyes watering. What Shuichi had said to Kokichi at the time wasn’t at all cruel; he remembered the situation, where Kokichi was manically laughing over Gonta’s metaphorical grave. If only they had figured out that the laughter was from sheer madness, instead of genuine malice.

Yet those words had stuck with Kokichi, far beyond their intention, poisoning his mind and bringing him to those feelings all over again. Kokichi really believed that he was all alone.

Well, then Kaito would just have to prove him wrong.

Kaito drew in a deep breath, and before he could think twice about it, walked over to Kokichi to wrap his arms around him.

Kokichi yelped, and initially squirmed. “What are you doing?! Get off—”

“You’re _not_ alone.”

Kokichi stilled, eyes widened and lips parted. “What…?”

“You’re _not_ alone. You don’t have to be alone.” Kaito pulled away, hands now resting on Kokichi’s shoulders, staring him right in the eye. “If you don’t want to be alone, then I won’t let you be. If you want someone there, then I’ll be there. I’m sure the others feel the same. They all came to the party, right? And I haven’t seen anyone that happy in months.” When Kokichi tried to bow his head, Kaito caught his chin with his hand to lift it back up. “I mean it. Maybe everything else is fake, but _we’re_ real, and we do care. And if nothing else, _I’ll_ be here for you. Okay?”

As soon as Kaito’s hand fell away, Kokichi’s gaze went with it, unable to look at him. “… Okay.”

“Well… all right then.” Kaito rubbed the back of his head. “Well, we should probably get back to the others, otherwise people might get suspicious or something.”

Kokichi didn’t say a word, and only weakly nodded in response.

As Kaito sighed and went to turn around, however, he felt a very fragile, gentle tug from the bottom of his shirt. He turned right back around, only for Kokichi to suddenly wrap his arms around him and bury his face into Kaito’s chest. Kokichi’s shoulders started shaking with quiet sobs. As Kaito felt his tears stain his shirt, he carefully wrapped his arms back around Kokichi. He didn’t say a thing. He didn’t need to. Kokichi didn’t need any more words. He was falling apart, and he needed someone to keep him together.

And Kaito didn’t intend to break his promise any time soon.


End file.
